People often complain about Fundamentalists or Baptists talking about hell. "Scare tactics," the cry is. The implication is that we're bullying people into doing something on the basis of an imaginary boogie-man.
Based on Scripture and the way Jesus Himself talked about hell, I think we're more like a fire alarm, alerting people to a very real danger and giving them the means of deliverance.
Here's an excellent post by John Piper on the subject of hell and why people choose it.
Thursday, October 29, 2009
Tuesday, October 27, 2009
The Old Bait-and-Switch
I used to think bad marketing was good evangelism.
It seemed the height of wisdom to advertise a big youth activity - pizza, games, skits, fun for all! Fliers would go out. Teens would be urged to play it up to their friends, to hype it at school, to urge it on their family.
In reality, there might be rather pathetic cheese pizza, 15 minutes of games, a skit performed by some people who ought to have known better, and then the youth leaders had fun herding all the teenagers into a big room to listen to a 45-minute sermon.
Sometimes, this was effective in getting people to trust Christ or make decisions for Him - the gospel is a powerful thing, even if it's abused by poor marketing. Depending on how dynamic or funny the speaker was, sometimes many would come back for more. But just as often, the kids who came were one-shot wonders, annoyed at being tricked into a church service when they were promised games and fun.
Now, believe me, I've got nothing against pizza. I'd be thrilled if they'd give it its own food group, and maybe put it down at the bottom of the pyramid, with roughly the same recommended portion as grains, veggies, meat, and dairy combined. (After all, those are all on a worthwhile pizza - why can't we just eat lots of pizza and call all those things done?)
I love games, and I especially love the kind of games that get played at youth rallies - lots of enthusiastic violence and mayhem, little refereeing, plenty of potential for exciting injuries. And if someone is really funny, let the man work!
But I don't like deception. And we don't need deception. If the world needed more games, Christ would have founded Nintendo instead of dying on the cross. If it needed more pizza, He could have served that instead of representations of His own flesh and blood at the last supper. If it needed more laughs, He could have told jokes instead of going to the cross in silence. What the world needed was good news - the gospel of Jesus Christ, crucified for our sins and risen from the dead. So that's what He gave us. And that's what we have to give the world.
There's no need to dress it all up and trick people into coming. Teens (and adults, for that matter) are desperate for real answers, for peace with God, for love, joy, hope, purpose, and acceptance. We've got all of that. Why hide the true power of what we possess behind a facade of skits and games? We're not here to entertain - we're here to transform.
I still have youth activies (and young adult activies, and so on). And they still involve lots of potential for injury, loads of pizza, and we laugh all the time. But I don't try to cover it up that we'll be looking at the Bible and talking about what it says, either. I try to make it clear what people can expect.
As we've done that, as we've renewed our focus on the Bible, as we've been up-front about when we're having a Bible study, when we're having a game day with a brief challenge, and when we're having a church service, the Lord has blessed. We're seeing young people saved, we're seeing them bringing their families to church with them, and we're seeing God work.
We don't have to trick people for Jesus. His truth is far more powerful.
It seemed the height of wisdom to advertise a big youth activity - pizza, games, skits, fun for all! Fliers would go out. Teens would be urged to play it up to their friends, to hype it at school, to urge it on their family.
In reality, there might be rather pathetic cheese pizza, 15 minutes of games, a skit performed by some people who ought to have known better, and then the youth leaders had fun herding all the teenagers into a big room to listen to a 45-minute sermon.
Sometimes, this was effective in getting people to trust Christ or make decisions for Him - the gospel is a powerful thing, even if it's abused by poor marketing. Depending on how dynamic or funny the speaker was, sometimes many would come back for more. But just as often, the kids who came were one-shot wonders, annoyed at being tricked into a church service when they were promised games and fun.
Now, believe me, I've got nothing against pizza. I'd be thrilled if they'd give it its own food group, and maybe put it down at the bottom of the pyramid, with roughly the same recommended portion as grains, veggies, meat, and dairy combined. (After all, those are all on a worthwhile pizza - why can't we just eat lots of pizza and call all those things done?)
I love games, and I especially love the kind of games that get played at youth rallies - lots of enthusiastic violence and mayhem, little refereeing, plenty of potential for exciting injuries. And if someone is really funny, let the man work!
But I don't like deception. And we don't need deception. If the world needed more games, Christ would have founded Nintendo instead of dying on the cross. If it needed more pizza, He could have served that instead of representations of His own flesh and blood at the last supper. If it needed more laughs, He could have told jokes instead of going to the cross in silence. What the world needed was good news - the gospel of Jesus Christ, crucified for our sins and risen from the dead. So that's what He gave us. And that's what we have to give the world.
There's no need to dress it all up and trick people into coming. Teens (and adults, for that matter) are desperate for real answers, for peace with God, for love, joy, hope, purpose, and acceptance. We've got all of that. Why hide the true power of what we possess behind a facade of skits and games? We're not here to entertain - we're here to transform.
I still have youth activies (and young adult activies, and so on). And they still involve lots of potential for injury, loads of pizza, and we laugh all the time. But I don't try to cover it up that we'll be looking at the Bible and talking about what it says, either. I try to make it clear what people can expect.
As we've done that, as we've renewed our focus on the Bible, as we've been up-front about when we're having a Bible study, when we're having a game day with a brief challenge, and when we're having a church service, the Lord has blessed. We're seeing young people saved, we're seeing them bringing their families to church with them, and we're seeing God work.
We don't have to trick people for Jesus. His truth is far more powerful.
Friday, October 23, 2009
"Asking 'Is It True?'"
The other day, I came across this post at Stuff Christians Like. It’s a neat post reminding us of God’s unconditional love for us and our position in Jesus Christ. The believer has already been made to sit in heavenly places in Christ Jesus, and we have been made suitable to that station. When Christ took our sinfulness on the cross, He granted to us His righteousness. When He took our death, He gave us His life.
That’s our position in Christ. But how we live is sometimes something completely different.
Back in the days when I could still play baseball without risking a pulled groin and aching for two days afterward, I was playing second base at a friend’s house.
The other team took only an inning or two to figure out that if they slid into second feet-first, deliberately aiming for my shins, I would get out of the way. Thus, even if the throw was beating them there, they could still be safe – and they could steal second at will.
Kids being kids, it took approximately 2.35 nanoseconds for this realization to make the transition to teasing and taunting.
Lacking the emotional alligator-hide I developed as life went on, I ended up fleeing home in tears to tell my dad, “They called me a chicken!” (This was especially meaningful to a boy who grew up on a small farm, where chickens are not only fearful, but also the smelliest and most disgusting of barnyard creatures to clean up after. Pigs got nuthin’ on chickens when it comes to stink.)
Looking back now as a dad on that situation, I’m sure it caught my dad a bit off guard. We parents are never really prepared for the crucial moments that sneak up on our children’s lives. Being the practical fellow that he is, he improvised and responded, “Well, are you?”
I suspect that his intent was to bring the conversation to the same place that Jon took it with his daughter. My presumed answer would be, “No, I’m not a chicken!” He could then say, “Well, then it doesn’t matter what they say, does it? You and I know it’s not true. Sticks and stones, blah, blah, blah.” (Sorry, parents never actually say, “Blah, blah, blah. But sometimes, I think we might as well.)
That’s how I expect he expected the conversation to play out. But his question brought me up short. It was one thing for neighborhood kids to call me a name and laugh at me – it was easy to disregard that as them being mean. But my dad wasn’t mean. And now he asked me to evaluate myself: was I being a chicken?
I was forced to admit to myself that, yes, I had been a chicken. I was afraid of getting my shins bumped, so I was running away. I admitted to my dad that I had been a chicken (though he was gracious enough not to comment on smell), and I headed back over to the neighbor’s.
The passing years have dimmed my memory of the exact course of events, but I think the next person or two who slid into the base aiming at my shins connected. And I didn’t run away. I hung onto the ball, and I fell on top of whoever slid into me. I wasn’t big, but I was bony, and that swiftly put a stop both to the teasing and to the problem my friends had with casual base-theft.
Sometimes, we’re hit with an uncomfortable accusation, whether from within or without, and we have to ask, “Is that true?” Is it true that I’m lazy? Is it true that I’m being a lousy husband/wife/dad/mom? Is it true that I’m making bad decisions in some area of my life? Is it true that I’m weak, cowardly, and insufficient?
It might be comfortable to shrug it off and rest happily in our standing in Jesus Christ. But what we do and how we live needs to match what we are in Him. And sometimes that means we need to face those tough questions, acknowledge the uncomfortable answer, and go change what needs to be changed.
Sometimes, instead of reminding us how wonderful we are in Jesus Christ, God, our Father, reminds us of how pitiful we are apart from Jesus Christ. Fortunately, this is never to beat us down – it’s to lift us up to living on the higher plane that is our birthright in Jesus Christ.
When He reminds us of failure, it’s to bring us to victory. When He confronts us with our weakness, it’s to grant us His strength. When He disciplines disobedience, it’s to motivate us to obedience. When He shows us our sin, it’s to bring us to repentance and His righteousness.
We simply have to be honest about what we are and be willing to change what He tells us in order to live as He has made us.
That’s our position in Christ. But how we live is sometimes something completely different.
Back in the days when I could still play baseball without risking a pulled groin and aching for two days afterward, I was playing second base at a friend’s house.
The other team took only an inning or two to figure out that if they slid into second feet-first, deliberately aiming for my shins, I would get out of the way. Thus, even if the throw was beating them there, they could still be safe – and they could steal second at will.
Kids being kids, it took approximately 2.35 nanoseconds for this realization to make the transition to teasing and taunting.
Lacking the emotional alligator-hide I developed as life went on, I ended up fleeing home in tears to tell my dad, “They called me a chicken!” (This was especially meaningful to a boy who grew up on a small farm, where chickens are not only fearful, but also the smelliest and most disgusting of barnyard creatures to clean up after. Pigs got nuthin’ on chickens when it comes to stink.)
Looking back now as a dad on that situation, I’m sure it caught my dad a bit off guard. We parents are never really prepared for the crucial moments that sneak up on our children’s lives. Being the practical fellow that he is, he improvised and responded, “Well, are you?”
I suspect that his intent was to bring the conversation to the same place that Jon took it with his daughter. My presumed answer would be, “No, I’m not a chicken!” He could then say, “Well, then it doesn’t matter what they say, does it? You and I know it’s not true. Sticks and stones, blah, blah, blah.” (Sorry, parents never actually say, “Blah, blah, blah. But sometimes, I think we might as well.)
That’s how I expect he expected the conversation to play out. But his question brought me up short. It was one thing for neighborhood kids to call me a name and laugh at me – it was easy to disregard that as them being mean. But my dad wasn’t mean. And now he asked me to evaluate myself: was I being a chicken?
I was forced to admit to myself that, yes, I had been a chicken. I was afraid of getting my shins bumped, so I was running away. I admitted to my dad that I had been a chicken (though he was gracious enough not to comment on smell), and I headed back over to the neighbor’s.
The passing years have dimmed my memory of the exact course of events, but I think the next person or two who slid into the base aiming at my shins connected. And I didn’t run away. I hung onto the ball, and I fell on top of whoever slid into me. I wasn’t big, but I was bony, and that swiftly put a stop both to the teasing and to the problem my friends had with casual base-theft.
Sometimes, we’re hit with an uncomfortable accusation, whether from within or without, and we have to ask, “Is that true?” Is it true that I’m lazy? Is it true that I’m being a lousy husband/wife/dad/mom? Is it true that I’m making bad decisions in some area of my life? Is it true that I’m weak, cowardly, and insufficient?
It might be comfortable to shrug it off and rest happily in our standing in Jesus Christ. But what we do and how we live needs to match what we are in Him. And sometimes that means we need to face those tough questions, acknowledge the uncomfortable answer, and go change what needs to be changed.
Sometimes, instead of reminding us how wonderful we are in Jesus Christ, God, our Father, reminds us of how pitiful we are apart from Jesus Christ. Fortunately, this is never to beat us down – it’s to lift us up to living on the higher plane that is our birthright in Jesus Christ.
When He reminds us of failure, it’s to bring us to victory. When He confronts us with our weakness, it’s to grant us His strength. When He disciplines disobedience, it’s to motivate us to obedience. When He shows us our sin, it’s to bring us to repentance and His righteousness.
We simply have to be honest about what we are and be willing to change what He tells us in order to live as He has made us.
Thursday, October 22, 2009
How to Win, part 5 - Finding Fulfillment
Why do people give in to addictions in the first place? Now, the first use of a cigarette or the first glance at porn or the first sip of beer may be a flippant thing - but what keeps us coming back? For you, the specific answer may be different than it is for me. We're all individuals.
Nonetheless, I think the root is pretty similar for all of us. We perceive a need or a desire, and we fulfill that need or desire through the addiction. Usually, we know the addiction is wrong - but it's the place we go to satisfy that need. As long as the need remains unmet elsewhere, the temptation is always going to be strong to return to the addiction.
If you're going to beat the addiction, you usually need something else to satisfy the need you perceive, something else to slate the hunger you feel for whatever you find in drink or drugs or porn.
Where do you find that fulfillment? The short answer is, "In Jesus Christ." If you've never been saved, you don't know the peace and joy that can come from walking with Him, no matter how bad the circumstances are. If we trust and obey Him, He really can meet every need. That won't take away the chemical element of an addiction, but it certainly does take care of the spiritual element.
Yet going beyond that, there are many legitimate outlets that He uses to meet our physical and emotional needs. What need does your drinking fill? Find the legitimate place you can get that need met. What need does your smoking fill? Find where you can get that apart from the addiction.
For me, it was porn, and it was rooted in the need to perceive respect and intimacy. Yeah, porn is a lousy substitute for a real relationship - any intimacy and respect that exists there is purely imaginary. But I think that's what I kept coming back there for.
What's the legitimate place to find that? In marriage, of course. Proverbs 5:15-20 reveal that an exciting, fulfilling relationship with your spouse is a great guard against immorality. And I Corinthians 7:2-5 are perhaps even more explicit. Spouses should protect one another from the temptation of immorality by being actively, joyously intimate (physically and emotionally) with each other. In fact, marriage is the ONLY legitimate place for sex, and it should be a haven of respect, as well.
The excuse comes easily, though. He/she won't let me. I'd love to have the real thing, but I'm stuck with the imaginary, because my spouse won't give me the real.
It's the same with drinking and drugs, a lot of the time. Those are used to escape problems. But they don't make the real problem go away, do they? They just make it easier to ignore.
Fundamentally, this is laziness. Instead of drinking or doping away the problems, go solve them with the Lord's help. Instead of turning to the imaginary intimacy of porn, make your marriage work.
Don't you think you'd work a little harder on your problems if there really were no other way out? Don't you think you'd work a little harder on making your marriage work right if you really didn't have any other outlet? You have to stop letting the addiction be the back door out of the hard work of solving problems. Odds are, the addiction not only is not helping you solve the real problems - it is contributing to them. So long as you allow yourself to walk out that back door, you are preventing yourself from getting the help you need or having the courage to take the stands you need to take in order to have the need met in a legitimate way.
So instead of turning to the imaginary and artificial, go back to the legitimate places of fulfillment. Start with Jesus Christ, and then use what He gives you, rather than substituting an addiction for a morally legitimate solution. I guarantee you it's more satisfying. It's one of the keys to long-term victory over addiction - getting the need met where it should be met.
Nonetheless, I think the root is pretty similar for all of us. We perceive a need or a desire, and we fulfill that need or desire through the addiction. Usually, we know the addiction is wrong - but it's the place we go to satisfy that need. As long as the need remains unmet elsewhere, the temptation is always going to be strong to return to the addiction.
If you're going to beat the addiction, you usually need something else to satisfy the need you perceive, something else to slate the hunger you feel for whatever you find in drink or drugs or porn.
Where do you find that fulfillment? The short answer is, "In Jesus Christ." If you've never been saved, you don't know the peace and joy that can come from walking with Him, no matter how bad the circumstances are. If we trust and obey Him, He really can meet every need. That won't take away the chemical element of an addiction, but it certainly does take care of the spiritual element.
Yet going beyond that, there are many legitimate outlets that He uses to meet our physical and emotional needs. What need does your drinking fill? Find the legitimate place you can get that need met. What need does your smoking fill? Find where you can get that apart from the addiction.
For me, it was porn, and it was rooted in the need to perceive respect and intimacy. Yeah, porn is a lousy substitute for a real relationship - any intimacy and respect that exists there is purely imaginary. But I think that's what I kept coming back there for.
What's the legitimate place to find that? In marriage, of course. Proverbs 5:15-20 reveal that an exciting, fulfilling relationship with your spouse is a great guard against immorality. And I Corinthians 7:2-5 are perhaps even more explicit. Spouses should protect one another from the temptation of immorality by being actively, joyously intimate (physically and emotionally) with each other. In fact, marriage is the ONLY legitimate place for sex, and it should be a haven of respect, as well.
The excuse comes easily, though. He/she won't let me. I'd love to have the real thing, but I'm stuck with the imaginary, because my spouse won't give me the real.
It's the same with drinking and drugs, a lot of the time. Those are used to escape problems. But they don't make the real problem go away, do they? They just make it easier to ignore.
Fundamentally, this is laziness. Instead of drinking or doping away the problems, go solve them with the Lord's help. Instead of turning to the imaginary intimacy of porn, make your marriage work.
Don't you think you'd work a little harder on your problems if there really were no other way out? Don't you think you'd work a little harder on making your marriage work right if you really didn't have any other outlet? You have to stop letting the addiction be the back door out of the hard work of solving problems. Odds are, the addiction not only is not helping you solve the real problems - it is contributing to them. So long as you allow yourself to walk out that back door, you are preventing yourself from getting the help you need or having the courage to take the stands you need to take in order to have the need met in a legitimate way.
So instead of turning to the imaginary and artificial, go back to the legitimate places of fulfillment. Start with Jesus Christ, and then use what He gives you, rather than substituting an addiction for a morally legitimate solution. I guarantee you it's more satisfying. It's one of the keys to long-term victory over addiction - getting the need met where it should be met.
Wednesday, October 21, 2009
It's All About Me!
I’m so important to God that Jesus Christ would have died on the cross just to save me, even if I were the only person on planet earth.
Let’s just take a moment and bask in the amazing love, mercy, and grace of God.
Let’s think about how precious we must be to God. Let’s focus on all the neat things He has done for us. Let’s make it all about us. Salvation is all about me, isn’t it?
Whups. Wrong answer.
There is blessed truth in some of what I just said. Jesus Christ really did die for my sins (along with the sins of the whole world). He really did reach out to me when I was in sin, an abominable wretch with no goodness in me and deserving of no goodness from Him. This proved His love beyond all possible doubt. He really does love me, and He really is my friend, not just an impersonal God. I'm not just a number to Him - I'm His precious child.
But it’s not all about me. Truly, it’s all for His glory. And even in the human scheme, I am not a stopping place for God’s love. I was never intended to be merely a destination for His love.
I John 4:12 says, “No man hath seen God at any time. If we love one another, God dwelleth in us, and His love is perfected in us.” The people of this world cannot see God. But they can see you and me.
God is love. (I John 4:8) But since they can’t see God, the only representation of the character of God that people have is how we who claim to be Christians treat them.
Only when we love them like God loved us is God’s love perfected in us. That doesn’t mean God’s love is flawed until we do something to make it right. That means God’s love hasn’t accomplished its intended purpose until it has flowed through us and touched someone else.
When we make salvation and the love of God all about us, we bottle up something that was meant to flow. We try to make a battery out of what should be a wire. We aren’t saved so we can sit around feeling snuggly in the love of God – we are saved so we can take His love to other people. Only when we do that is His love doing what it was meant to do in our lives.
Let’s just take a moment and bask in the amazing love, mercy, and grace of God.
Let’s think about how precious we must be to God. Let’s focus on all the neat things He has done for us. Let’s make it all about us. Salvation is all about me, isn’t it?
Whups. Wrong answer.
There is blessed truth in some of what I just said. Jesus Christ really did die for my sins (along with the sins of the whole world). He really did reach out to me when I was in sin, an abominable wretch with no goodness in me and deserving of no goodness from Him. This proved His love beyond all possible doubt. He really does love me, and He really is my friend, not just an impersonal God. I'm not just a number to Him - I'm His precious child.
But it’s not all about me. Truly, it’s all for His glory. And even in the human scheme, I am not a stopping place for God’s love. I was never intended to be merely a destination for His love.
I John 4:12 says, “No man hath seen God at any time. If we love one another, God dwelleth in us, and His love is perfected in us.” The people of this world cannot see God. But they can see you and me.
God is love. (I John 4:8) But since they can’t see God, the only representation of the character of God that people have is how we who claim to be Christians treat them.
Only when we love them like God loved us is God’s love perfected in us. That doesn’t mean God’s love is flawed until we do something to make it right. That means God’s love hasn’t accomplished its intended purpose until it has flowed through us and touched someone else.
When we make salvation and the love of God all about us, we bottle up something that was meant to flow. We try to make a battery out of what should be a wire. We aren’t saved so we can sit around feeling snuggly in the love of God – we are saved so we can take His love to other people. Only when we do that is His love doing what it was meant to do in our lives.
Friday, October 16, 2009
Putting People in the Wrong Places
In the business world, people work their way up through the ranks. It's a great system, far better than so many social and economic systems where a person is locked into a particular role simply because of their race or parents.
I'm afraid, though, that many of our churches are applying this model to something it shouldn't apply to.
Here's how it works in many fundamental churches:
Young guy decides he's called to preach, goes to Bible college. If he's smart, he usually finds a way to work in a local church for at least some of the time he's in school.
Young guy graduates from college with minimal experience, but a fair bit of book-learning, and possibly the most balance in his education he'll have at any point in his life.
Young guy looks for a church. At this point, there are several courses open. Strangely, big, healthy churches that can afford to pay well enough to comfortably support a family and that aren't likely to explode or implode within the next year rarely hire a kid fresh out of school. They're able to attact someone with experience, someone who has proven himself. Sometimes, the young guy becomes an assistant pastor at one of these healthy churches, where he learns the ropes of big-church ministry under an experienced pastor. These positions are limited, though, and frequently, the duties in such a position are very limited too, so that he becomes an expert at one aspect of ministry, but doesn't learn much about the practical side of the rest of it.
Sometimes, he becomes an assistant, but at a church that isn't so strong and healthy - he might have to work part-time or even full-time to support his family, but at least he's getting some experience, and hopefully some training from an experienced pastor. Unfortunately, if the church can't afford an assistant, it's often because the church has some kind of problem. Many times, the young guy becomes the fall guy when there's a problem. Note that he's also receiving training from someone who is not the pastor of a strong healthy church - sometimes, this is because the pastor isn't capable of building and operating a strong, healthy church, and thus, his training is flawed.
Sometimes, he goes straight into the pastorate himself. But since the strong, healthy churches are already being served by experienced, knowledeable men, he winds up with a small, unhealthy church. The problem is that while he's got a pretty balanced education, there's no way even a graduate degree can prepare him for all the tensions and problems a small, struggling church can have. So the young guy gets a trial by fire. Sometimes, he gets fed up and quits. Sometimes, the church demonstrates why it's small and unhealthy by running him off. Sometimes, he manages to learn on the job fast enough to keep his job and survive to either build the church up or to be noticed by one of those strong, healthy churches, where he goes as soon as he can.
There's a problem here. The guys who actually have the knowledge and experience to navigate the troubled waters of small-church ministry aren't in the small churches anymore! They've taken easier, better-paying positions at large, healthy churches. The guys who are getting the problem cases are the ones who are the least prepared and qualified to handle them.
Now, I know I'm speaking in generalities here. I know guys who came out of Bible college quite capable of starting a church or taking a troubled church, and by God's grace, and without too much hindrance from the congregation, making it work. I know that in some ways, it's a different skill set to administrate a church of 1,000 people, as opposed to shepherding the small flock of 40. (This is part of the problem with the young guy being an assistant in a large church, then expecting to step out and pastor a small church successfully.) The man who can do one well may not be able to do the other well.
I also know that faithfulness in the small is required before responsibility in the large, and it would perhaps be a greater disaster to put someone incompetent in charge of a church of 500 than a church of 50.
But rather than sorting out who is best suited to what kind of ministry, we do it like the business world - throw them in the water, sink or swim, and the guys who make it get the cushiest spots on the island.
Now, I'm not about to disgard the traditional Independent Baptist model of pastoral selection. I don't want some group over me telling me which church I have to go work for, or telling churches who they can and can't hire as pastors. I especially don't want said group shuffling me from church to church every few years - it can take years to really become effective as pastor of a new group of people. It takes time for their vision to adapt to your leadership and for you to learn the personalities, strengths, and weaknesses of a congregation.
The current system takes men who could have been good pastors and throws them to the wolves before they are ready. It takes men who belong in administrative roles or primarily preaching roles and has them in situations the Lord never gifted or equiped them for.
Do I have a great solution, a better system?
Well, the solution is not a system. The solution is to get back to choosing pastors based on Biblical guidelines rather than business-world models. A church is not a business. The right pastor is not necessarily the person with the most apparently-ideal education, background, and family makeup. The right church for a pastor is not necessarily the one that pays the best or is the most comfortable.
Both churches and pastors need to step away from a business-world way of thinking and ground their decisions in the Word of God, trusting the Spirit of God. God knows the right man for the job, and He knows the right job for the man. If we let Him put the bodies together, I suspect they'll work a whole lot better.
What do you think about churches and how they get pastors?
I'm afraid, though, that many of our churches are applying this model to something it shouldn't apply to.
Here's how it works in many fundamental churches:
Young guy decides he's called to preach, goes to Bible college. If he's smart, he usually finds a way to work in a local church for at least some of the time he's in school.
Young guy graduates from college with minimal experience, but a fair bit of book-learning, and possibly the most balance in his education he'll have at any point in his life.
Young guy looks for a church. At this point, there are several courses open. Strangely, big, healthy churches that can afford to pay well enough to comfortably support a family and that aren't likely to explode or implode within the next year rarely hire a kid fresh out of school. They're able to attact someone with experience, someone who has proven himself. Sometimes, the young guy becomes an assistant pastor at one of these healthy churches, where he learns the ropes of big-church ministry under an experienced pastor. These positions are limited, though, and frequently, the duties in such a position are very limited too, so that he becomes an expert at one aspect of ministry, but doesn't learn much about the practical side of the rest of it.
Sometimes, he becomes an assistant, but at a church that isn't so strong and healthy - he might have to work part-time or even full-time to support his family, but at least he's getting some experience, and hopefully some training from an experienced pastor. Unfortunately, if the church can't afford an assistant, it's often because the church has some kind of problem. Many times, the young guy becomes the fall guy when there's a problem. Note that he's also receiving training from someone who is not the pastor of a strong healthy church - sometimes, this is because the pastor isn't capable of building and operating a strong, healthy church, and thus, his training is flawed.
Sometimes, he goes straight into the pastorate himself. But since the strong, healthy churches are already being served by experienced, knowledeable men, he winds up with a small, unhealthy church. The problem is that while he's got a pretty balanced education, there's no way even a graduate degree can prepare him for all the tensions and problems a small, struggling church can have. So the young guy gets a trial by fire. Sometimes, he gets fed up and quits. Sometimes, the church demonstrates why it's small and unhealthy by running him off. Sometimes, he manages to learn on the job fast enough to keep his job and survive to either build the church up or to be noticed by one of those strong, healthy churches, where he goes as soon as he can.
There's a problem here. The guys who actually have the knowledge and experience to navigate the troubled waters of small-church ministry aren't in the small churches anymore! They've taken easier, better-paying positions at large, healthy churches. The guys who are getting the problem cases are the ones who are the least prepared and qualified to handle them.
Now, I know I'm speaking in generalities here. I know guys who came out of Bible college quite capable of starting a church or taking a troubled church, and by God's grace, and without too much hindrance from the congregation, making it work. I know that in some ways, it's a different skill set to administrate a church of 1,000 people, as opposed to shepherding the small flock of 40. (This is part of the problem with the young guy being an assistant in a large church, then expecting to step out and pastor a small church successfully.) The man who can do one well may not be able to do the other well.
I also know that faithfulness in the small is required before responsibility in the large, and it would perhaps be a greater disaster to put someone incompetent in charge of a church of 500 than a church of 50.
But rather than sorting out who is best suited to what kind of ministry, we do it like the business world - throw them in the water, sink or swim, and the guys who make it get the cushiest spots on the island.
Now, I'm not about to disgard the traditional Independent Baptist model of pastoral selection. I don't want some group over me telling me which church I have to go work for, or telling churches who they can and can't hire as pastors. I especially don't want said group shuffling me from church to church every few years - it can take years to really become effective as pastor of a new group of people. It takes time for their vision to adapt to your leadership and for you to learn the personalities, strengths, and weaknesses of a congregation.
The current system takes men who could have been good pastors and throws them to the wolves before they are ready. It takes men who belong in administrative roles or primarily preaching roles and has them in situations the Lord never gifted or equiped them for.
Do I have a great solution, a better system?
Well, the solution is not a system. The solution is to get back to choosing pastors based on Biblical guidelines rather than business-world models. A church is not a business. The right pastor is not necessarily the person with the most apparently-ideal education, background, and family makeup. The right church for a pastor is not necessarily the one that pays the best or is the most comfortable.
Both churches and pastors need to step away from a business-world way of thinking and ground their decisions in the Word of God, trusting the Spirit of God. God knows the right man for the job, and He knows the right job for the man. If we let Him put the bodies together, I suspect they'll work a whole lot better.
What do you think about churches and how they get pastors?
Thursday, October 15, 2009
How to Win, part 4 - Run Away, Run Away!
There’s this guy named Tito. Tito is not a nice guy. Tito likes hurting people, especially me. He hangs out on a street corner I walk by on the way to work, and pretty much whenever I see him, we get in a fight. Not just a little disagreement or shoving match – a fight, the kind that doesn’t end until someone pulls the two of you apart or one of you can’t get up.
Those fights hardly ever seem to go well. Two fights ago, he cracked two of my ribs. In the course of the fights with him, I’ve lost a couple teeth, gotten three concussions, dislocated both shoulders, hyper-extended my left knee, broken my wrist, and forgotten how many stitches I’ve ended up needing. But I’m not going to let that guy beat me, so I keep going back there, and even though I lose more than I win, and even though I get hurt badly every time I lose, I keep fighting him, because, hey, I’ve got my pride.
Probably every man who reads this is nodding, either hoping they’d do the same thing, thinking about the times they’ve done the same thing (and proud of it), or wishing they had the guts to do the same thing. Men, we’re stupid sometimes, aren’t we? (It’s not like we’ve got a monopoly on stupidity; I could tell you stories, if I didn’t value my life… but isn’t this pretty typical guy thinking? Isn’t this rooted in pride, and don’t we know where that leads?)
There is no guy named Tito. Well, okay, there is, and he really is a tough guy, so, Tito, if you’re out there, I didn’t mean anything by that. I’m not exactly a cupcake, but I’ve got NO desire to end up facing off with you.
But Tito or no Tito, there is temptation. It’s like that big bruiser just waiting for you to come by so he can pick a fight with you. Now, you may be a tough guy yourself, but you know you don’t always win those fights. And whatever your win-loss record, you know that when you lose, man, it hurts.
Paul told his protégé Timothy in II Timothy 2:22, “Flee also youthful lusts: but follow righteousness, faith, charity, peace, with them that call on the Lord out of a pure heart.” He didn’t say to stand up to and fight the lusts head on – he told him to run, Timothy, run.
You can’t lose a fight you’re not in. So why go by that corner where the bruiser is waiting for you? Much of the time, we could beat addictions a lot more easily if we got serious about cutting off the sources of temptation.
Problem with drinking? Don’t go near a bar, and don’t hang out with friends who drink. Problem with drugs? Yeah, it might get ugly, but find a way to cut yourself off from your supply, even if it means turning people in to the police. Problem with lust/porn? Get a filter and/or tracker (such as Covenant Eyes) on your computer, and stay away from entertainment and places that make it hard to control what you look at.
This will probably mean changing the places you go, the things you usually do, and the people you hang around with. But then, do you really want to stay the same? If this will help you escape that addiction, isn't it worth it?
Get smart. You know yourself enough to know when and where you usually give in to temptation – the best defense is no be there.
If you’re trying to reduce the battles you lose, there are two things you can do – prepare to win more of the fights you’re in, and avoid any fight you can. A smart Christian will do both of those. You can’t avoid every temptation, because this is a pretty messed-up world we’re in. But you should avoid every one you reasonably can.
Don’t stroll by the corner hoping you can beat Tito this time – take another way to work, so you get there with your ribs intact.
Those fights hardly ever seem to go well. Two fights ago, he cracked two of my ribs. In the course of the fights with him, I’ve lost a couple teeth, gotten three concussions, dislocated both shoulders, hyper-extended my left knee, broken my wrist, and forgotten how many stitches I’ve ended up needing. But I’m not going to let that guy beat me, so I keep going back there, and even though I lose more than I win, and even though I get hurt badly every time I lose, I keep fighting him, because, hey, I’ve got my pride.
Probably every man who reads this is nodding, either hoping they’d do the same thing, thinking about the times they’ve done the same thing (and proud of it), or wishing they had the guts to do the same thing. Men, we’re stupid sometimes, aren’t we? (It’s not like we’ve got a monopoly on stupidity; I could tell you stories, if I didn’t value my life… but isn’t this pretty typical guy thinking? Isn’t this rooted in pride, and don’t we know where that leads?)
There is no guy named Tito. Well, okay, there is, and he really is a tough guy, so, Tito, if you’re out there, I didn’t mean anything by that. I’m not exactly a cupcake, but I’ve got NO desire to end up facing off with you.
But Tito or no Tito, there is temptation. It’s like that big bruiser just waiting for you to come by so he can pick a fight with you. Now, you may be a tough guy yourself, but you know you don’t always win those fights. And whatever your win-loss record, you know that when you lose, man, it hurts.
Paul told his protégé Timothy in II Timothy 2:22, “Flee also youthful lusts: but follow righteousness, faith, charity, peace, with them that call on the Lord out of a pure heart.” He didn’t say to stand up to and fight the lusts head on – he told him to run, Timothy, run.
You can’t lose a fight you’re not in. So why go by that corner where the bruiser is waiting for you? Much of the time, we could beat addictions a lot more easily if we got serious about cutting off the sources of temptation.
Problem with drinking? Don’t go near a bar, and don’t hang out with friends who drink. Problem with drugs? Yeah, it might get ugly, but find a way to cut yourself off from your supply, even if it means turning people in to the police. Problem with lust/porn? Get a filter and/or tracker (such as Covenant Eyes) on your computer, and stay away from entertainment and places that make it hard to control what you look at.
This will probably mean changing the places you go, the things you usually do, and the people you hang around with. But then, do you really want to stay the same? If this will help you escape that addiction, isn't it worth it?
Get smart. You know yourself enough to know when and where you usually give in to temptation – the best defense is no be there.
If you’re trying to reduce the battles you lose, there are two things you can do – prepare to win more of the fights you’re in, and avoid any fight you can. A smart Christian will do both of those. You can’t avoid every temptation, because this is a pretty messed-up world we’re in. But you should avoid every one you reasonably can.
Don’t stroll by the corner hoping you can beat Tito this time – take another way to work, so you get there with your ribs intact.
Wednesday, October 14, 2009
The First Month
It has now been a little over a month since everything changed.
It hasn't been an easy month, and it hasn't been a perfect month. At least twice, I've caught myself deliberately looking at things I shouldn't have, and on many others, my eyes have lingered on things they should have glanced away from. But I praise the Lord that despite the struggle and small failures, I haven't gone back where I came from. I haven't looked at porn once in that span. That's not to my credit - I tried and failed for 20 years to leave that stuff behind but was never able to overcome it. It's entirely due to the work of Jesus Christ in my life.
I thank Him also for my wife. I was determined to let God change my life and to do what is right no matter what her response was. I knew that my confession would hurt her terribly, and I had no idea how she would respond. By God's grace and His work in her life, she's reacted as well as I could have expected. There are still some rocky trails to travel, but at least we're still traveling them together.
Things aren't quite what I expected, incidentally. Between stepping away from the addiction and moving away from goofing off on computer games and the like to focus more on ministry, I figured I'd have a terrific influx of time and energy. I figured I'd finally get caught up on the backlog of work I've got and be able to really work ahead on some things and do some things I've wanted to tackle for a while. It turns out that there still isn't enough time in the day/week. I still feel behind, and though I've been able to get more done, I guess, it still seems like it's not enough.
However, that's countered by what feels like an increase of power. It's strange... even when I wasn't consistently getting victory, I think I was still right with God most of the time. But there is such a difference between that and what I have now, where the pattern is victory instead of failure. It's hard to put a finger on what the difference consists of - but I think there is a real difference. It's not that I have time to do that much more, or even that I do it that much better - but it seems to have more effect. Or maybe that's just perception. But I don't think so.
So that's what the first month has been like for me. If you've beaten an addiction, what was the first month free like for you?
It hasn't been an easy month, and it hasn't been a perfect month. At least twice, I've caught myself deliberately looking at things I shouldn't have, and on many others, my eyes have lingered on things they should have glanced away from. But I praise the Lord that despite the struggle and small failures, I haven't gone back where I came from. I haven't looked at porn once in that span. That's not to my credit - I tried and failed for 20 years to leave that stuff behind but was never able to overcome it. It's entirely due to the work of Jesus Christ in my life.
I thank Him also for my wife. I was determined to let God change my life and to do what is right no matter what her response was. I knew that my confession would hurt her terribly, and I had no idea how she would respond. By God's grace and His work in her life, she's reacted as well as I could have expected. There are still some rocky trails to travel, but at least we're still traveling them together.
Things aren't quite what I expected, incidentally. Between stepping away from the addiction and moving away from goofing off on computer games and the like to focus more on ministry, I figured I'd have a terrific influx of time and energy. I figured I'd finally get caught up on the backlog of work I've got and be able to really work ahead on some things and do some things I've wanted to tackle for a while. It turns out that there still isn't enough time in the day/week. I still feel behind, and though I've been able to get more done, I guess, it still seems like it's not enough.
However, that's countered by what feels like an increase of power. It's strange... even when I wasn't consistently getting victory, I think I was still right with God most of the time. But there is such a difference between that and what I have now, where the pattern is victory instead of failure. It's hard to put a finger on what the difference consists of - but I think there is a real difference. It's not that I have time to do that much more, or even that I do it that much better - but it seems to have more effect. Or maybe that's just perception. But I don't think so.
So that's what the first month has been like for me. If you've beaten an addiction, what was the first month free like for you?
Tuesday, October 13, 2009
The Life of a Pastor....
I've been wanting to post here on nearly a daily basis, or at least on a regular 3-4 time a week schedule. But doing this quietly and doing it so that there is not obvious overlap between what I post here and what I use in ministry places a handicap on that.
Oddly, the life of a pastor is not all sitting around composing thought-provoking blog posts. Ministry is rather like juggling when there's one more item in the air than what you can normally handle. Whenever you feel like you've finally gotten the hang of keeping it all up there, somebody tosses another knife or torch or chainsaw into your pattern. Every once in a while, you're able to get far enough ahead to retire one of the items and breathe for a moment. In those moments, I try to blog. But the last week has not had many of those moments.
(And no, reading articles about the NFL has nothing to do with this time shortage. Nothing at all.)
So, I'll try again tomorrow. Not the NFL reading - there's only two more articles I care about to read tomorrow - the blog posting.
Oddly, the life of a pastor is not all sitting around composing thought-provoking blog posts. Ministry is rather like juggling when there's one more item in the air than what you can normally handle. Whenever you feel like you've finally gotten the hang of keeping it all up there, somebody tosses another knife or torch or chainsaw into your pattern. Every once in a while, you're able to get far enough ahead to retire one of the items and breathe for a moment. In those moments, I try to blog. But the last week has not had many of those moments.
(And no, reading articles about the NFL has nothing to do with this time shortage. Nothing at all.)
So, I'll try again tomorrow. Not the NFL reading - there's only two more articles I care about to read tomorrow - the blog posting.
Friday, October 9, 2009
Needing Meat to Meet
I have been accused of not being sufficiently in touch with my feminine side. Come to think of it, I think the accusation was more along the lines of my not possessing a feminine side at all.
Really, I'm okay with that, actually, so maybe I should take it as more of a compliment, even though it was meant as an accusation. Given that the hobby I persue most actively these days involves arm bars and throwing people, it's probably a good thing that any feminine side I might possess is well-concealed.
That being the case, this awesome take on the Christian men's retreat cracked me up.
Really, I'm okay with that, actually, so maybe I should take it as more of a compliment, even though it was meant as an accusation. Given that the hobby I persue most actively these days involves arm bars and throwing people, it's probably a good thing that any feminine side I might possess is well-concealed.
That being the case, this awesome take on the Christian men's retreat cracked me up.
Wednesday, October 7, 2009
How to Win, part 3 - Going to the Right Place
I'd love to visit New Orleans right now. The Cajun food, the way the Saints are playing on both sides of the ball, the warm weather, the alligators... ahhh, the destination of my current dreams.
The last place in the USA I want to go is Chicago. Not even the Jay Cutler-led Bears or the deep dish pizzas are enough to make me want to visit that place. The wind, the weather in general, the ugliness of the city, the corrupt politics - it really is the one place in the entire country I have the least interest in visiting.
In fact, I'm so determined not to visit there that I mapquest Chicago from the address of every place I go, so I don't accidentally start heading there. I have bought roadmaps and highlighted all the routes that might lead to Chicago from where I live. I've contacted the airlines and checked into all the flights that lead to Chicago, just to make sure I don't get on one. Even the railroads and the bus schedules have all been checked and memorized to make sure I don't end up going there, even by accident.
I've got pictures of the skyline, and I've memorized a good portion of the city map, so I never drive those streets. There's a calendar of Chicago scenes hanging on my wall to remind me not to visit Chicago and see those scenes. There are menus from 14 Chicago pizza places in my desk, because I definitely don't want that pizza to lure me into going there and have me end up in those places.
I've got a sports card collection that features the complete Bears team for the last 18 years, the Bulls since Michael Jordan started for them, and the last few years of the White Sox. (Nope, no Cubs stuff... why even think about them, since they're not likely to tempt me to go there?)
I have six scale models of the Sears Tower, and in fact, I buy all of my appliances from Sears to remind me never to visit the Sears Tower. I focus on almost all things Chicago in my obsessive determination not to go there. I don't want to go to Chicago. I want to go to New Orleans.
This is stupid.
If I want to go to New Orleans, why am I thinking about Chicago at all? It's not like Chicago is on any legitimate route to New Orleans from where I live. Why buy maps that lead to a place I don't want to go? Wouldn't a much more effective way not to visit Chicago be to prepare to go to New Orleans? It'd be smarter to get maps and schedules for routes I want to travel than to obsess about avoiding the place I don't want to go. It would be smarter to collect things from the place I long to see than to pull together things that remind me of what I want to avoid.
But this is exactly what most of us do with sin, especially addictions. We say, "I want to live righteously. I don't want to fall into this sin." Well, that's great. It's important to define where you are and where you want to go and to recognize that there are places you never want to return. It's important to know what the real problem is and what was stopping you from beating it. It's the next step where we are so often stupid.
After having determined where we don't want to go, we then spend our time, thoughts, and energy obsessing about where we DON'T want to go. That's ridiculous. If you don't want to go there, but there is someplace you do want to go, focus on the destination you WANT to reach. If you're traveling to New Orleans by any legitimate route from where I live, you will NOT end up in Chicago.
This is Biblical.
Galatians 5:16: "This I say then, Walk in the Spirit, and ye shall not fulfill the lust of the flesh." The way to live holy is not by avoiding sin. The way to avoid sin is by being holy. You don't walk in the Spirit BY not fulfilling the lust of the flesh. You walk in the Spirit so that you DON'T fulfill the lust of the flesh.
Don't focus on the sin you're trying to avoid. In fact, in a sense, don't even try to avoid it. Instead, focus on living for Christ. If you're living for Christ, you will not be sinning. Throw out the maps that lead to sin. Throw out all the souvenirs of it and all the connections to it. Fill the house of your mind instead with the things of God. Plan your journey to the righteousness of Christ, and set foot on that journey, and there is no way you will end up in sin, because they're on completely different routes.
A spiritual battle (which any addiction is) is ultimately fought in the mind. And when you give footholds to the thought of sin, eventually you go back to it. Even if you start off thinking bad things about it, just continuing to think about it eventually corrupts your mind, and you end up back there in it again. (Yeah, I know this from experience.) So don't let yourself dwell on the sin or addiction, even if you're excusing it by trying to come up with all the reasons why it's bad and you'll never go back there.
Know how to ensure that you don't go there? Go someplace else. Someplace right.
Please understand that I'm not saying to pretend there is no problem if you really have one. I'm not talking about shoving sin into the mountain of stuff under a rug. Sin thrives on darkness, and if you're bound by it, you won't beat it by pretending it's not there. But once you've acknowledged that what you're doing is sin, you've confessed it, and you've determined to forsake it, don't even give it a foothold in your mind by dwelling on not going there.
Focus your thoughts on righteousness, and by default, they won't be foul. If you win the battle in your mind, you'll win it in your body too. Philippians 4:8: "Finally, my brethren, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are of good report; if there be any virtue, and if there be any praise, think on these things."
This can also be summed up as the replacement principle. If there's something bad in your life you want to get rid of, you don't just chuck it out and expect everything to be super awesomeriffic. You replace it with something good. If you don't replace the bad thing, it leaves a vacuum, and that vacuum is often filled with something you really don't want in there. Instead, you shove out the bad thing by replacing it with something good. If you don't want to take a trip into sin, start traveling toward righteousness.
Don't want to go to Chicago? Then start heading for New Orleans. Don't want to walk back into addiction? Then start taking steps into righteousness.
The last place in the USA I want to go is Chicago. Not even the Jay Cutler-led Bears or the deep dish pizzas are enough to make me want to visit that place. The wind, the weather in general, the ugliness of the city, the corrupt politics - it really is the one place in the entire country I have the least interest in visiting.
In fact, I'm so determined not to visit there that I mapquest Chicago from the address of every place I go, so I don't accidentally start heading there. I have bought roadmaps and highlighted all the routes that might lead to Chicago from where I live. I've contacted the airlines and checked into all the flights that lead to Chicago, just to make sure I don't get on one. Even the railroads and the bus schedules have all been checked and memorized to make sure I don't end up going there, even by accident.
I've got pictures of the skyline, and I've memorized a good portion of the city map, so I never drive those streets. There's a calendar of Chicago scenes hanging on my wall to remind me not to visit Chicago and see those scenes. There are menus from 14 Chicago pizza places in my desk, because I definitely don't want that pizza to lure me into going there and have me end up in those places.
I've got a sports card collection that features the complete Bears team for the last 18 years, the Bulls since Michael Jordan started for them, and the last few years of the White Sox. (Nope, no Cubs stuff... why even think about them, since they're not likely to tempt me to go there?)
I have six scale models of the Sears Tower, and in fact, I buy all of my appliances from Sears to remind me never to visit the Sears Tower. I focus on almost all things Chicago in my obsessive determination not to go there. I don't want to go to Chicago. I want to go to New Orleans.
This is stupid.
If I want to go to New Orleans, why am I thinking about Chicago at all? It's not like Chicago is on any legitimate route to New Orleans from where I live. Why buy maps that lead to a place I don't want to go? Wouldn't a much more effective way not to visit Chicago be to prepare to go to New Orleans? It'd be smarter to get maps and schedules for routes I want to travel than to obsess about avoiding the place I don't want to go. It would be smarter to collect things from the place I long to see than to pull together things that remind me of what I want to avoid.
But this is exactly what most of us do with sin, especially addictions. We say, "I want to live righteously. I don't want to fall into this sin." Well, that's great. It's important to define where you are and where you want to go and to recognize that there are places you never want to return. It's important to know what the real problem is and what was stopping you from beating it. It's the next step where we are so often stupid.
After having determined where we don't want to go, we then spend our time, thoughts, and energy obsessing about where we DON'T want to go. That's ridiculous. If you don't want to go there, but there is someplace you do want to go, focus on the destination you WANT to reach. If you're traveling to New Orleans by any legitimate route from where I live, you will NOT end up in Chicago.
This is Biblical.
Galatians 5:16: "This I say then, Walk in the Spirit, and ye shall not fulfill the lust of the flesh." The way to live holy is not by avoiding sin. The way to avoid sin is by being holy. You don't walk in the Spirit BY not fulfilling the lust of the flesh. You walk in the Spirit so that you DON'T fulfill the lust of the flesh.
Don't focus on the sin you're trying to avoid. In fact, in a sense, don't even try to avoid it. Instead, focus on living for Christ. If you're living for Christ, you will not be sinning. Throw out the maps that lead to sin. Throw out all the souvenirs of it and all the connections to it. Fill the house of your mind instead with the things of God. Plan your journey to the righteousness of Christ, and set foot on that journey, and there is no way you will end up in sin, because they're on completely different routes.
A spiritual battle (which any addiction is) is ultimately fought in the mind. And when you give footholds to the thought of sin, eventually you go back to it. Even if you start off thinking bad things about it, just continuing to think about it eventually corrupts your mind, and you end up back there in it again. (Yeah, I know this from experience.) So don't let yourself dwell on the sin or addiction, even if you're excusing it by trying to come up with all the reasons why it's bad and you'll never go back there.
Know how to ensure that you don't go there? Go someplace else. Someplace right.
Please understand that I'm not saying to pretend there is no problem if you really have one. I'm not talking about shoving sin into the mountain of stuff under a rug. Sin thrives on darkness, and if you're bound by it, you won't beat it by pretending it's not there. But once you've acknowledged that what you're doing is sin, you've confessed it, and you've determined to forsake it, don't even give it a foothold in your mind by dwelling on not going there.
Focus your thoughts on righteousness, and by default, they won't be foul. If you win the battle in your mind, you'll win it in your body too. Philippians 4:8: "Finally, my brethren, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are of good report; if there be any virtue, and if there be any praise, think on these things."
This can also be summed up as the replacement principle. If there's something bad in your life you want to get rid of, you don't just chuck it out and expect everything to be super awesomeriffic. You replace it with something good. If you don't replace the bad thing, it leaves a vacuum, and that vacuum is often filled with something you really don't want in there. Instead, you shove out the bad thing by replacing it with something good. If you don't want to take a trip into sin, start traveling toward righteousness.
Don't want to go to Chicago? Then start heading for New Orleans. Don't want to walk back into addiction? Then start taking steps into righteousness.
Tuesday, October 6, 2009
John Piper on Fundamentalists
John Piper is a guy I have a lot of respect for. I don't agree with the presuppositions that underpin much of his theology (though he can doubtless argue his position far more eloquently than I can mine), but he has a brilliant mind that he devotes to glorifying God and exhorting His people. So I thought this was pretty cool.
Why John Piper doesn't take potshots at Fundamentalists.
Why John Piper doesn't take potshots at Fundamentalists.
Friday, October 2, 2009
How to Win, part 2 - What Is Stopping You?
When struggling with an addiction, it's easy to get blinders on. That way lies frustration, dejection, madness, and probably bad breath.
It's all too easy to get wrapped up in combatting the specific problem. It's easy to berate yourself for not having the sheer will-power to say no to the cigarette, the website, the needle, or the Starbucks coffee. I mean, it should be simple - Just Say No, right? You know it's bad for you, you know it will cost more than it will pay in the long run, so why do you keep going back to the addiction? You end up beating yourself up over and over again because you didn't have the will-power to say no, even though you knew you should. But I don't think the real problem is necessarily will-power.
Remember, it's all spiritual. Yes, even the temptation to have that second helping of your sugar/fat combination of choice can be spiritual, if it's an issue of addiction. Spiritual problems can be pretty sneaky, because they're rooted in a very deceptive place - our hearts. They're good at getting tangled up with each other in the darkness, and that makes it hard for us to beat them, because sometimes we're fighting the wrong one.
A breakthrough came for me this past summer. I was at a Christian camp, and I have no idea what the preacher was speaking on at the time, but it suddenly hit me. My problem was pornography. But that wasn't what was stopping me from getting freedom. What was stopping me from getting freedom was pride. It wasn't the thing on the surface, but it was stopping me from ever getting sustainable victory over the thing on the surface.
In I John 2:16, sin is broken down into three main categories: the lust of the flesh (the desire to feel good), the lust of the eyes (the desire to have good), and the pride of life (the desire to be or be seen as good). Pornography, depending on its use, would seem most obviously to fit into one of those first two categories (as would most things recognized as addictions, I suspect). But for me, it was pride that had me fighting in the darkness, entirely apart from the motives for using the porn (which also centered more around pride than you might think).
It was pride which had me thinking I was different than everybody else, and I really could beat this thing on my own. I'd seen it in other people fighting drugs and alcohol, and I'd always shake my head and urge them to get help, to quit trying to do it their own way and start trying God's way. As long as they kept on hanging onto their own attempts at victory while trying to project a good face to everyone around them, they inevitably failed. Yet here I was, thinking I was going to be different - better, stronger, smarter than everyone else. That was pride.
And when I used the porn, I was deluding myself into thinking I was different than all the other fallen pastors and deacons and fathers and husbands I'd known or heard about. I was the one who was going to get away with it. I was the one who was smart enough not to get caught, strong enough not to let it destroy his marriage and ministry. That was pride.
Those two elements of pride had me wrestling this alone in the darkness instead of dragging it out into the light of God. They had me fighting it on my own, instead of telling my wife. And so although I was sinning with pornography, the chains it had me bound in were formed of my own pride.
For me, it was a huge step when I went to God and admitted I wasn't different from everybody else, I wasn't stronger and smarter and better. I had to go to Him and tell Him I'd do whatever He wanted so I could beat this. And then the chains were broken. They're still constantly trying to reform around me... but now I know what they're made of.
Knowing the battle you're in is a huge step toward winning. Identify not just what you're fighting... but what is keeping you from winning.
It's all too easy to get wrapped up in combatting the specific problem. It's easy to berate yourself for not having the sheer will-power to say no to the cigarette, the website, the needle, or the Starbucks coffee. I mean, it should be simple - Just Say No, right? You know it's bad for you, you know it will cost more than it will pay in the long run, so why do you keep going back to the addiction? You end up beating yourself up over and over again because you didn't have the will-power to say no, even though you knew you should. But I don't think the real problem is necessarily will-power.
Remember, it's all spiritual. Yes, even the temptation to have that second helping of your sugar/fat combination of choice can be spiritual, if it's an issue of addiction. Spiritual problems can be pretty sneaky, because they're rooted in a very deceptive place - our hearts. They're good at getting tangled up with each other in the darkness, and that makes it hard for us to beat them, because sometimes we're fighting the wrong one.
A breakthrough came for me this past summer. I was at a Christian camp, and I have no idea what the preacher was speaking on at the time, but it suddenly hit me. My problem was pornography. But that wasn't what was stopping me from getting freedom. What was stopping me from getting freedom was pride. It wasn't the thing on the surface, but it was stopping me from ever getting sustainable victory over the thing on the surface.
In I John 2:16, sin is broken down into three main categories: the lust of the flesh (the desire to feel good), the lust of the eyes (the desire to have good), and the pride of life (the desire to be or be seen as good). Pornography, depending on its use, would seem most obviously to fit into one of those first two categories (as would most things recognized as addictions, I suspect). But for me, it was pride that had me fighting in the darkness, entirely apart from the motives for using the porn (which also centered more around pride than you might think).
It was pride which had me thinking I was different than everybody else, and I really could beat this thing on my own. I'd seen it in other people fighting drugs and alcohol, and I'd always shake my head and urge them to get help, to quit trying to do it their own way and start trying God's way. As long as they kept on hanging onto their own attempts at victory while trying to project a good face to everyone around them, they inevitably failed. Yet here I was, thinking I was going to be different - better, stronger, smarter than everyone else. That was pride.
And when I used the porn, I was deluding myself into thinking I was different than all the other fallen pastors and deacons and fathers and husbands I'd known or heard about. I was the one who was going to get away with it. I was the one who was smart enough not to get caught, strong enough not to let it destroy his marriage and ministry. That was pride.
Those two elements of pride had me wrestling this alone in the darkness instead of dragging it out into the light of God. They had me fighting it on my own, instead of telling my wife. And so although I was sinning with pornography, the chains it had me bound in were formed of my own pride.
For me, it was a huge step when I went to God and admitted I wasn't different from everybody else, I wasn't stronger and smarter and better. I had to go to Him and tell Him I'd do whatever He wanted so I could beat this. And then the chains were broken. They're still constantly trying to reform around me... but now I know what they're made of.
Knowing the battle you're in is a huge step toward winning. Identify not just what you're fighting... but what is keeping you from winning.
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